[Bootstrap Love] Episode 1: The dating habits of the earthbound non-entrepreneurs

Hi! I am E-Trep (ET)! (short for EnTREPreneur)

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus and I am from Uranus. Well, I am still trying to figure out which planet I am from, but it is fun to say the above sentence aloud! Don’t believe me? Say it aloud and see for yourself.

I am an alien who has painstakingly morphed himself into what the scientists call the ‘human’ form. I go through the motions of living a ‘normal’ life on a daily basis – I meet real humans who call themselves friends; I go to places that serve nourishment and force the goop down my throat; and to really throw off any suspicions about my origin, I even go to these armchairs with holes (seriously weird!) every morning and pretend to download stuff there. Now you know why I said I go through the ‘motions’ of living a normal life!

You see, I might look like one of the humans, but deep down, I am not. The image below makes the differences and the reason of this series of articles very obvious.

Over the course of my stay on earth, I have figured out a couple of things:

1. There are others from my planet: Yippee, I am not alone!! We acknowledge each other subtly with signals that only we can understand. A nod of the head, a handshake of support, an email with best wishes. We meet each other in the guise of ‘conferences’ like the recent TechSparks 2013 in this place called Bangalore.
2. My brethren are looking for mates: Maybe we are getting earth-ified, or maybe we have given up hope that our home planet is ever going to send troops to bring us back to the mother ship, or maybe we are simply looking for a co-founder. Whatever the reasons, I have come to realize that even we have started looking for mates.

And therein lay the problem. We might be great at the work that we do, we may be applauded for our efforts to change how the humans live, and some earthbound humans may even think of us as role models, never even having an inkling that that they are actually referring to an alien race. But we are handicapped when it comes to finding a mate and experiencing what they refer to as lasting love (not for the work, my friends).

So I have dedicated a part of my life to demystifying this process and writing a manual that can be understood by you, my alien-mates. It’ll be written in the E-Trep language and over the course of the coming weeks, you’ll be able to read this manual here. You can either choose to tune into my telepathic frequency, or you can choose to watch this space next week!